Melbourne: Secret Laneways and Shoe Box Cafes

Venture down any of Melbourne’s bluestone backstreets and you’ll discover a secret society of unmarked bars, quirky cafes and hole-in-the-wall eateries. 

Bernard O'Riordan

There seems to be an unwritten rule in Melbourne that whenever a new cocktail bar or café opens it must be so nondescript that it’s virtually impossible to find.

How else can you explain the explosion of tiny bars that are hidden in laneways, buried in basements, up rickety staircases, in-between buildings and even on secret rooftops.

Inspired by the quiet dive bars and speakeasies of New York, Melbourne’s modern watering holes are so secluded that you really need to know what you’re looking for, or you’ll miss them entirely.

Take one of the city’s quirkiest new cocktail bars – one that technically doesn’t even have a name. Search long enough and you might find this secret bar tucked away behind a simple pizza shop at Meyers Place.

Pizza or cocktails?

With no name and no signage to guide you, simply make your way Pizza Pizza Pizza and ask to see the ‘secret menu’.

With a bit of luck, you’ll be ushered through a thick black curtain into an uber cool world of 70’s style décor and vintage cocktails like the Harvey Wallbanger, Rusty Nail and Piña Colada.

It’s a similar story across town, at the southern end of Chapel Street, where you’ll find an American-style sandwich bar that is also a clever front for one of the best hidden bars around.

Open up the over-sized freezer door behind the sandwich counter at Boston Sub and you’ll discover a secret entrance to a tropical Tiki bar known as Jungle Boy.

Nothing can describe the jaw-dropping experience when you first walk through the cool-room door; it’s like you leave reality behind as you enter a leafy, jungle-like oasis on the other side.

Unknown
What’s behind the cool room door?..
Entrance-1024x683
It’s a jungle-like oasis.

There are a lot of bars like this right now. They can be found all over Melbourne, and in fact in any big city, skulking in the shadows.

These so-called speakeasy bars hark back to the 1920s and a time of Prohibition in the US, when drinking holes operated in covert locations while the rest of the world passed by obliviously outside.

People love the atmosphere of discovery and the feeling of exclusivity.

To avoid police raids and prosecution, bars that sold alcohol would keep a very low profile and customers were told to speak quietly (speakeasy) about them.

While Melbourne has fallen hard for this global fad, the truth is, many of these modern bars are so popular they’re hardly a secret. But people still love the atmosphere of discovery and the feeling of exclusivity that these bars represent.

Thankfully, it’s not just Melbourne’s bar fraternity cashing in on the trend: café owners and restauranteurs are also proving dab hands at turning a bleak, tiny space into the next big thing.Union Kiosk

Tucked away down Causeway Lane, between Bourke Street all and Little Collins Street, you’ll find Union Kiosk – a shoebox cafe where the menu is  100 per cent vegan.

In the 1930’s, the tiny holds-in-the-wall  was a ‘smokes & sweets’ store, part of the Union Bank building (hence the name).

These days  it churns out an assortment of creative toasties and jaffles (think veggie bolognese with mozzarella; mushroom, basil and spinach with mozzarella), as well as slices and  sweet treats.

Oh, and let’s not forget the coffee.

About 400 metres around the corner, you’ll find another quirky curiosity known as the  Switchboard Café.

Housed in what was once a switchboard cupboard on the ground floor of the heritage-listed Manchester Unity building 1t 220 Collins Street, this must be up there as one of the world’s smallest sit-down cafés.

Switchboard+Cafe+12+copy
Switchboard Cafe.

It is literally a hole-in-the-wall with seating across a drafty arcade for just a handful of customers. But it has a loyal following and serves some of the best coffee in town.

It would be remiss not to also mention another tiny watering hole with a big reputation known as Bar Americano. Located at 20 Presgrave Place – off Howey Place between Collins and Little Collins Streets –  it serves up coffee by day and cocktails by night.

l-1
Bar Americano.

This white-tiled bar is standing room only, with room for just 10 customers, so it can be tough to nab a space. Just look for the blue illuminated ”Tabacchi” sign above the front door. (No they don’t actually sell tobacco these days).

Melbourne also has its fair share of rooftop bars, including Rooftop at Curtin House on Swanston Street. Rooftop is something of an institution and doubles as a cinema in summer. Unfortunately, it has just closed for renovations but plans to reopen bigger and better by summer.

While you’re in the neighbourhood, head to the nearby Noodle Kingdom where you’ll find a staircase that leads to a hidden rooftop bar known as Goldilocks Bar.

With one of the world’s biggest and busiest tram networks and a grid-style city layout, you can easily explore hidden bars and restaurants throughout the city with relative ease.

Each of the major east-west streets in the CBD has an accompanying laneway, which grew out of the boom development after the 1850’s gold rush.

Here’s a list of charming laneways and intriguing venues to visit the next time you’re in Melbourne. They’re not all hidden, but a little bit of insider knowledge does go a long way.

We’re only scratching the surface with this list, but as I’m sure you’ll discover, in Melbourne there’s a surprise around every corner.

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Berlin Bar

86-3

You can visit both sides of the Berlin Wall at this hidden bar on Corrs Lane, in the heart of Melbourne’s CBD.

The great divide of Cold War Germany is alive and well with one side of the bar – West Berlin – opulent and swanky and the other – East Berlin – decidedly more austere with a bathtub and double bunks to sit on (pictured).

One serves cocktails, the other serves beer. One has luxurious décor and leather chairs, the other settles for long wooden tables and chairs.

Finding Berlin Bar is perhaps the biggest challenge. Hidden down a grungy laneway and up a dimly lit flight of stairs, you’re met with a locked door on arrival. Ring the bell and they’ll look through a peephole and invite you in when it’s your turn.

Address: 16 Corrs Lane, access via Little Bourke St and a narrow laneway off Lonsdale St.

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Sister Bella

This is another of those hidey-hole bars where if you blinked you’d miss it. Hidden down grungy Sniders Lane behind Melbourne Central, is this small bar with no signage and no seating.

Thankfully that’s just the front bar. Head to the back and up the stairs and you’ll find a bigger bar serving cocktails and comfort food (like cheese toasties)

Address: 22 Sniders Lane, CBD.

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Loch and Key

You’ll find this sophisticated and somewhat intimate cocktail bar up a wooden staircase, behind a bookcase, on the site of Melbourne’s oldest pub (built in 1853).

Aside from the comfy couches and amazing cocktails, one of the biggest attractions at Loch and Key is its spacious, covered outdoor terrace with city views. They also have Guinness on tap and an extensive wine list.

Address: 34 Franklin St, CBD.

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Hairy Little Sista

A café by day and a tapas bar and cocktail lounge by night, Hairy Little Sista is a spin off of the iconic Hairy Canary, which recently closed its doors after 15 years.

The bar, couches, high benches and scattering of dining tables lend themselves more to snacking rather than proper sit-down meals. The upstairs space frequently hosts comedy and theatre.

Address: 212 Little Collins St.

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Siglo

It’s not really hidden, but it is a nice spot for a late night drink on the terrace or even supper after a show at the nearby Princess Theatre. This rooftop bar and lounge overlooks Spring St, Parliament House and its gardens.

The menu is typically aimed at a late night supper crowd with a range of classic desserts like tiramisu and crème brûlée. I personally like the big leather sofas inside on a cold winter night.

Address: Level 2/161 Spring Street, opposite Parliament House.

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Centre Place

Centre Place
Centre Place

Centre Place is one of the most photographed laneways in Melbourne and it’s filled with dozens of tiny cafes, eateries, bars and shops.

You could easily be in Italy or some other European city as you sip on a cafe latte at one of the outdoor tables and watch as street performers strut their stuff nearby.

Be warned though, this narrow laneway has become something of a tourist hotspot and is often crowded, particularly at lunchtime. Check out nearby Degraves Street and its wall-to-wall cafes and juice bars.

Address: Off Flinders Lane, CBD

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Causeway Lane

Causeway Lane
Laurent Patisserie at The Causeway

Causeway Lane, officially known as The Causeway, runs between Bourke Street Mall and Little Collins Street, and it’s home to some unassuming boutiques, cafes and sushi bars.

On the corner at Little Collins is Laurent Patisserie (pictured), a French artisan bakery housed in the heritage-listed Union Bank building – with its tall curved palazzo-styled facade.

It’s a favourite whenever I visit Melbourne with a stunning assortments of cakes, pastries, croissants, baguettes and coffee.

Across the lane, Sushi Monger attracts a loyal lunchtime crowd hungry for their handmade rolls, bento boxes and warming miso. In the middle of the lane you’ll find the aforementioned Union Kiosk.

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Meyers Place/Crossley Street

This strip at the top of Bourke Street was home to Melbourne’s first laneway bar, the ever-popular Meyers Place Bar (pictured below), which opened in 1994.

The Sabbadini family, who own the building, took over the site in 2017 and opened a new bar called Bar Carlo.

meyers-place-44236-2
The original Meyers Place Bar, with The Waiters Restaurant next door.

It took a while, but the ever-popular Meyers Place Bar dusted itself off and reopened just a street away,  at 7/24 Crossley Street, just across Bourke Street and down the laneway near the iconic Pellegrini’s.

It’s kind of tricky to find, just look for the nondescript green brick entrance (below) at 7 Crossley Street.

 

The new bar is cosy and crowded, particularly on a cold Friday night, but it’s every bit as charming as it was in its previous life. They’ve even salvaged the original 15-tonne concrete bar.

As much as I love this place, things didn’t go too smoothly on a recent visit. The beer pumps were out of order so I settled for a gin and tonic, which tragically had more tonic and ice and virtually no gin. We’ll forgive them this time.

Back up at Meyers Place laneway you’ll finds numerous bars and restaurants – including Loop Roof (see below)  Lily Black’s, which has one of the biggest collections of bitters in the world, and the Argentinian grill San Telmo.

Many bars and restaurants are not even on street level, so it sometimes pays to look to the skies. They include:

The Waiters Restaurant

IMG_3272.JPG

If you enjoy a no-frills Italian experience (think laminex tables, mismatched cutlery and a blackboard instead of menus), The Waiters Restaurant should be right up your alley.

You’ll find it behind a heavy door at Meyers Place, up a wooden staircase. It’s so understated that you could easily walk on by without realising.

At the Parliament end of Bourke Street, it was once a popular late-night haunt for politicians and journalists in search of a good story.IMG_2554

I’ve eaten here several times with friends and still only sampled a fraction of the menu, but the Pappardelle con Funghi (mushroom pappardelle) is always a favourite.

The restaurant (pictured) has had a slight refurb in the past year. Gone are the mock-wood panels on the walls – replaced with a fresh lick of paint, new carpet and new tables.

Thankfully, the menu has remained virtually untouched. I mean, why meddle with something that’s perfect?

Address: 20 Meyers Place, between Bourke and Little Collins Streets.

champagne-glass-vector_39688


Loop Roof

50c106c12bd42797967ac412f65d8b1a

Set in an open-air, exotic garden framed by city office blocks, this is one of the best rooftop bars in the inner city.

The terrace, with its astro turf and planter boxes, is accessible via a long staircase next to Loop Bar.

The garden vibe is also reflected in its drinks menu which includes a rose petal, pumpkin puree and exotic fruit theme. Loop is something of a haven for artistic types.

Address: Level 3, 23 Meyers Place.champagne-glass-vector_39688

Hardware Lane

photo0jpg
Grab a table at Grill Steak Seafood

This brick-paved laneway is bursting with cafes and restaurants, including a few trendy and sophisticated eateries.

Whether you’re craving Indian, Spanish, Italian or Asian – Hardware Lane is certain to have a restaurant to suit. Just be prepared to be bombarded with offers as each restaurant touts for your business.

Hardware Lane, which runs roughly north-south between Bourke Street and Little Lonsdale Street, has long been popular with the locals, but is increasingly becoming a magnet for tourists as well.

It’s an atmospheric place to dine al fresco, particularly in the warmer months, surrounded by the old warehouse facades.

I always seem to end up grabbing an outside table at the same place – Grill Steak Seafood (66 Hardware Lane). It’s perfect just for a glass of wine and a spot of people watching in the afternoon, or a meal when the sun goes down.

Address: Between Bourke St and Little Lonsdale St, CBD

champagne-glass-vector_39688

Pizza Pizza Pizza –: 16 Meyers Place

Jungle Boy-: 96 Chapel Street, Windsor

Rooftop & Cinema-: 252 Swanston Street, on the rooftop at Curtain House

Goldilocks Bar-: Level 4, 264 Swanston Street

nCf81NRtwitter-follow-achiever

You Might Have Seen Our Work In These Publications

Screenshot at Jan 05 11-48-31

One comment

Leave a Reply to Melbourne: The Best Foodie Neighbourhoods Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.